Politics

Toughest Sheriff On Earth to Hunt Down Alleged Obama Doubles

How can the president be in two places at once?

How can the president be in two places at once?

AZ – Sheriff Joe Arpaio, known for his iron fist and steel spine, has apparently been spending his post-holiday season chasing the facts and details about a little reported story of a possible Obama “double”. A tourist in Hawaii is claiming he’s taken pictures of a vacationing Obama, days after the president had been reported back in Washington working to strike a deal with Congress.

The story, first reported at Associated Pulp, has drawn disbelief and ire throughout the Internet and blogosphere. But Arpaio says he isn’t angry, he simply wants to crack the case behind the rumors of President Obama being spotted in two places at once.

“I don’t necessary believe it,” the old sheriff said, “but I’m going to disprove it or shed light on the facts one way or another. If I find a cloned Obama, my team is going to take it out, plain and simple.” Arpaio quickly dismissed any idea of violence toward the actual president. “We’re doing this for his and America’s safety. It has nothing to do with the real president.”

He admitted he had six of his best investigators on the trail. They are called the Double Mob. They’ll be analyzing the pictures in question and conducting their own research. Because the investigation might entail dangerous work, each team member will be heavily armed.

“It’s got to be one of two things,” Arpaio said of the controversial report. “Maybe some men bear a natural resemblance to the president, and there was a simple mistake made.” The other option, he warned, carried heavy ramifications: that there really is an Obama clone; an Obama double, used to distract or enhance or confuse the public’s perception of the president’s true image.

If there are Obama look-alikes, Arpaio thinks the story should be exposed. “The mainstream media wouldn’t touch it with a ten foot pole,” he said, “so it’s up to regular folks.” If there are Obama clones, the story will, Arpaio admits, be startling and the government’s secret projects will have to be disclosed. Also, the clone(s) must be taken out.

If there are men who bear a natural resemblance to Obama, and they’re used to obfuscate the White House’s political agenda, the sheriff will expose the purposes behind it. “While there may not be any laws in the books forbidding the president to use ‘doubles’,” Arpaio said, “there should be.”

Other world leaders are said to have had look-alikes to make it harder for assassins to take out the real man. Saddam Hussein and his sons were believed to have body doubles who would make public appearances in order to obstruct anybody wishing to expose their real locations.

As one reader of Kenny’s Sideshow blog wrote of the ‘double’ Obama report: “Noting photos of Obama with obvious scalp scars and the probability of there being more than one Obama, this info fits right in.” The reader then posted the entire article “in case it disappears….”

Another reader commented: “It has been reported that Saddam Hussein had at least three doubles. At this point in time, Obama is no less evil in what he has been doing than what Hussein had been accused of doing. The known actions of Obama are catastrophic enough, so his secret ones would be much worse. Just what Executive Orders, or massacres is he plotting in D.C. while we are told he is just “relaxing” in Hawaii? Treasonous danger to Americans lurks wherever Obama and his criminal mafia are secretly closeted together.”

It seems the toughest sheriff in America has support in his hunt for Obama doubles.

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