ASSOCIATED PULP LOS ANGELES — The public choking deaths of three prominent Los Angeles foodies has prompted an investigation into the trendy movement that celebrates all things edible. Experts and aficionados alike are scratching their heads and wondering if there’s a darker side to the foodie fanaticism that seems to promote at dangerous, even zealous … Continue reading
ASSOCIATED PULP Hyde Park — A new type of desperation is turning the tables on the beleaguered, crime-ridden South Side of Chicago as reports show impoverished university students are lurking into the largely un-policed areas around Hyde Park to grab wallets and iPhones from unsuspecting folks in the poor neighborhoods notorious for their decades of gang … Continue reading
ASSOCIATED PULP Authorities warned residents of Los Angeles County that many streets would be closed off due to President Barack Obama’s visit Monday night. The president is slated to stay for two days, and make stops along the Westside and Glendale, while surely snarling traffic in unpredictable, but significant ways. While the president’s route has … Continue reading
ASSOCIATED PULP Kabul — An Afghanistan family injured in a wayward United States drone strike have just about run out of patience attempting to apply for much needed medical assistance through the Obamacare website, Healthcare.gov. While the site keeps crashing on them, as the family gathers round the local computer station in the library ten … Continue reading
(republished at Dear Dirty America) ASSOCIATED PULP Upon returning to the United States after a year-long stint as a Fulbright Fellow in the Middle East, whizkid and all around nice guy, Nigel Cage, has been asked repeatedly what he learned studying overseas, to which he has, reportedly, only given one answer, “I didn’t realize it … Continue reading
(republished at Dear Dirty America) “They wouldn’t lie to me, would they?” former president George Bush Jr asks his butler, Menlo, after the latter read aloud a recent news article about Pulitzer Prize winning journalist Seymour Hersh calling the entire story of the Osama bin Laden raid “one big lie.” Menlo often reads the news to Bush … Continue reading
(republished by Dear Dirty America) Amid catastrophic website problems, the battered president, still weary and worn from a two-week government shutdown battle with Congress, admitted his healthcare plan for Americans was not running as smoothly as possible. In fact, he admitted the Affordable Care Act rollout was a train wreck. The problems range from the … Continue reading
(republished at Dear Dirty America) The latest salacious Kim Kardashian bare butt tweets fueled further speculation Friday that the reality television star diva is not actually her real self but a nearly flawless clone that is virtually undetectable to the naked eye. The Twitterverse erupted in skepticism over the photo the most famous Kardashian released … Continue reading
We’re pleased to announce our services here at Associated Pulp were recognized by the news and satire blog, Dear Dirty America, and we’ve been acquired by the site. We’re hopeful that our brand of humor and news stories will reach more folks over at DDA. You can expect the same from us, just on a … Continue reading
As President Obama embarked on his campaign-style Midwest tour to make clear his agenda on reinvigorating the struggling American economy, many citizens who tuned into the president’s speech were shocked at the size and scale of his initiative. The looming crises over the debt ceiling and the federal budget seemed to be large enough hurdles … Continue reading
Most people seem to think technology is developing faster than we could have ever expected, but few have witnessed such an unbelievably spectacular technological feat as the Trayvon Martin protesters did in Leimert Park on Tuesday evening. They certainly didn’t think they’d be seeing the president that night, but did they? The protesters held signs … Continue reading
It’s hardly been twenty-four hours since the controversial Trayvon Martin trial has wrapped up, but sources close to the defendant say George Zimmerman, encouraged by a ‘not guilty’ verdict, is ready to “get back out there” as night watchman. Apparently he’s in good spirits and “stoked beyond belief” about the not guilty verdict. He’d been … Continue reading
UNDERGROUND SOMEWHERE – Before long, Google’s new nerd glasses, which allow their wearers to always be connected online and undertaking one Internet task or another, will be worn by nearly everyone. For those who refuse, soon they will be the new versions of the no-Facebook-page folks, who are really just updated versions of the we-don’t-believe-in-having-a-TV … Continue reading
WASHINGTON – In a supposed move to assimilate teenage refugees from Afghanistan into American culture, the White House has forcefully employed them to do a specific task in Washington as a way to pay penance and work their way into society. The refugees, mostly teenage boys who had once been detained by U.S. forces in … Continue reading
Associated Pulp 